4.0 Dedicated to its Members and Fans of Pokemon A Pokemon Sandbox RP
Pokémon Dubstep (ft. Lindsey Stirling)
W
elcome Adventurer to EPOCH! A Pokemon Sandbox Rp set in the original region of Nue. Everything you need to know will be in the Guidebook and PokeDex 101!
EPOCH uses the Manga and is built on the Original ideas suggested by our members.
We are more than just a Pokemon RP, we're a friendly community with a goal on being a memorable experience for those that look in.
Golden Rule: Treat others as you wish to be treated. If you find yourself content with being an asshole EPOCH and its members will not tolerate you.
RULES
Understand We're All Human. Respect the staffers as well as your fellow members and guests. We all have flaws, tempers and quirks. Be patient with one another, but if issues involving other members come up please don’t just grin and bear it. Contact a staff member, informing them of what's going on so they can address and resolve the situation. The staff won't know what's bothering you unless you tell them.
EPOCH is PG-13. Proboards’ Terms of Service:
Sex; When you get under the clothes, fade to black.
Violence; Do not go into extreme nauseating detail.
Cursing; This is so fucking allowed, but don't go overboard.
Suggestive Content; In avatars, signatures and templates can attract the wrong kind of attention. So be careful.
Even with the certainty that Jerry was masking what he was feeling, the warmth in Jerry's smile and the soft laughter still carried with it the same soothing quality it had always had for Lucas. Not near enough to chase away all the anxiety and concern coursing through him, but it was a step closer once more to taking some of the edge off and settling him down.
It was absurd, at the joke of a hovercraft for his birthday, his first thought was that he would get him one. As though something like that would make up for what happened today, but in that moment he was willing to do anything, say anything, to start making things alright again. To have Jerry not have to be worrying about him, trying make him feel better when he himself probably needed it so much more.
The gentle weight of Jerry's hand on top of his head felt good, real. Another connection to solid ground to channel himself into. With another quiet, steadying breath he paused from his work and looked up, meeting Jerry's gaze with one of soft, undemanding curiosity. There was that feeling again, looking at Jerry now - the weariness, the cuts and bruises, the exposed scars, that smile - that he had always believed in Jerry. Since they were little, Jerry had always amazed him, been something larger than life, not out of any idolized misconceptions or delusions, but just by who he was, what he had been through, how he kept going. And now more than ever, he knew nothing was ever going to change that feeling. This man was his best friend, his brother in every way that mattered, and whatever happened, together they were making it out of this.
Lucas nodded at the request for baby wipes, going back to finishing up the work on Jerry's shoulder. He had seen a pack of them in the kit. He glanced up slightly as Jerry asked for something to cover his scars as well, and Lucas simply nodded again. Baby wipes, shirt, eye patch, the string of tasks to keep him focused, useful.
Jerry laid out the options for what to do next, and Lucas' brow furrowed slightly, doing the last touches on Jerry's shoulder. ". . . Um," the placeholder hanging in the air as a way to let Jerry know he had understood and considering the question more than anything else. Their pursuers would probably check around the closest town first, so lying low for a bit might be a good idea. Honestly, Lucas' head was still too far behind to truly wrap around all the pros and cons of either plan, but when it came down to it, he didn't want to face another long desert drive at the moment. He didn't want to face the town, and probably force Jerry into the position of having to lead him around and make sure he was following alright. ". . . we could stay out here, if you think it's alright," he said, pulling back from Jerry's shoulder. He bagged the used supplies and started putting the kit away, getting out the pack of baby wipes and setting it on the center console for Jerry to pick up. ". . . give us some time to . . . settle down a bit, and everything . . ." He shrugged slightly, glanced at the rearview mirror. Nothing but empty desert for miles, right?
He smiled a little at Jerry, and hit the switch to pop the craft's trunk. "Some rest would probably do us both good, before we try to figure out what's next . . . I-I'll go get your things."
Lucas opened the car door, looking out at the desert before climbing out, sneakers hitting the sand and it took a moment for the wave to come. The delayed vertigo made him sway slightly on the first step, and he put a steadying hand on the roof of the craft, pretending to just be looking around for a moment. What he wanted to do was sit down and put his head in his hands, but on the list of Alarming Things to Do, that was probably pretty high up there, and after a long moment he made his way to the back of the hovercraft, ignoring the feeling that the world was shifting around.
He opened the trunk, surveyed the bags. Grabbed one of Jerry's and pulled it over to himself, sitting on the edge of the trunk and unzipping it. " . . . Uh, good thing we didn't try to unpack," he said lightly, glancing over at Jerry over the backs up the seats. He pulled out a lightweight, long-sleeve shirt and then dragged another bag over that held some coats and blankets for later. Using it to lean on for a moment, he finally pulled on of his own bags over to fish a spare eyepatch out from one of the inner side pockets. Then he just sat there for a moment, looking back the way they had come and waiting for his head to settle before he tried getting up and walking again.
Giving Lucas something to do, things that needed to be done to help out was a good call, Jerry silently assured himself. Lucas was a gentle soul with a heart more pure than gold. To see someone suffering and being unable to help them was probably one of the worst things for the prince of Saffron to sit through. While Jerry in his mind was already chastising himself for making the jittery blond take care of all these things, despite being completely capable of handling them himself, he reminded himself it was necessary. He was growing anxious just sitting there though wanting to do something more than letting Lucas care for him as usual.
The final touches to his wound would finally follow his inquiry on Lucas’s opinion on their two options. One being civilization and the other being just a bizarre land mark he’d happened across on his way here originally, either way Jerry would do his best to ensure neither of them was spotted by their pursuers. Lucas sounded out an acknowledgment of his question and Jerry comfortably settled in place to wait for the other to make up his mind – no rush. Being here in the middle of nowhere, it wasn’t like they needed to rush themselves out of there. He honestly would prefer to stay out of town though, they’d be likely to get some odd looks given their current hampered states. They were memorable faces, an odd combination of a prince and a rat, heads turned when Lucas entered a room and brows quirked when Jerry was right beside him. It was funny to think about, almost making him crack a smirk, before Lucas speaking up would immediately call for his attention.
“We could stay out here, if you think it’s alright.”
Of course they’d choose the same option and he gave a curt nod before Lucas would try to validate his decision with points the red head already agreed with. He pressed further back into the seat as the blond reached around to press the button to pop the trunk before relaxing once more in the driver’s seat. “Then we'll head to that place I mentioned, instead” he assured, looking over to Lucas as he’d mention the well needed rest. Yeah, with Lucas’s sleep schedule, any second of sleep would be really good, especially now. As Lucas stepped out of the craft, Jerry turned slightly to keep a sharp eye on him. Though he tried to play it off, the sway of his body was too much for him to easily dismiss and he almost wanted to reach over and grab a hold of his shirt. A tug to get his attention was all, but as Jerry began to move, there was a violent protect from his shoulder where he’d been stabbed. Scoffing quietly at the pain, he glanced down at the wound and just mentally thanked Arceus that he didn’t need stitches at least. That would’ve been a nasty and stressful thing to try and handle after well…
Shaking his head, Jerry simply shifted his focus to the baby wipes and got to cleaning off the patches of blood from his arm and face. The white cloth was steadily turning a few shades of red as Jerry cleaned himself up and he tossed it into a plastic bag acting as their trash bag in the vehicle. After such a harsh beat down, the adrenaline wearing off, the weight of the world just felt like it was dropped right back onto his shoulders and Jerry slowly leaned forward to just rest against the steering wheel while Lucas dug through the trunk. He let out a quiet snort and chuckle as Lucas remarked that it was a good thing they didn’t try to unpack, which had indeed been a good thing. “Thank Arceus we decided to be a couple of lazy bums today, huh?” he called back without bringing his head back up. He could feel the familiar eyes of Lucas digging into his back and part of him warned that if Lucas saw him hunched over, it’d just make the man more concerned, but he didn’t want to move. He really just wanted to settle down and rest as had been suggested.
Not until they got to the rest spot, though. He forced himself to sit up slowly with notable effort before slowly bringing his head up to look back at the door as Lucas would return with the shirt, coats and blankets, and even an…
Eye patch?
“You brought a spare eye patch for me?” he asked, blinking in surprise. Of course there’d been the occasional slip up where Jerry would lose his eye patch, but he never thought that Lucas had actually gone out to collect backups for him. He was ready to wrap his head in a scarf again, but this would do. He smiled warmly at the sight, once more eternally grateful for the angel that was Lucas Courtwater, and reached up to set his hand lightly over the scars on his face. “Thanks” he sighed, and held his hand out for the gear for him. His hand was no longer trembling as it was before, but as he waited for his things to be handed back to him, he was suddenly hit with a reminder of just what those hands of his had done. His head slowly tilted away from looking at Lucas to studying the side view mirror instead. His hand started to tremble a little bit, again.
“If you’re done with the trunk, shut it and we’ll pull the final stretch to the rest spot I got in mind” he informed, before swiveling slightly in his seat to check on the Pokémon in the back of the car. Flash was hiding away behind Lucas’s chair, his fur all fluffed out like he’d walked through an electric tunnel while Jack was perched on top of one of the back seats just looking very much done with the world. It’d be as Jerry looked to the prior that the Pokémon would settle a bit and look to him curiously. Jerry reached around with a small grimace to gently ruffle the mutt’s fur before finally he’d turn his gaze back to Lucas with a warm smile. Once the shirt and patch was in his possession, Jerry would take to the task of pulling on the shirt first with a bit more effort than typically needed. Every muscle ached, and the act of petting a Growlithe or putting on a shirt wasn’t exactly easy on him. Then came the annoying act of trying to put on his eye patch correctly, but the rearview mirror could only help him so much. The knot was not properly holding and he let out a small hiss of frustration when he accidentally plucked some of his hair in the process. He was gonna need a bit of help with that.
As Jerry responded to his comment about the luggage, Lucas turned to look back over the seats at him again. The frown upon seeing him hunched forward over the steering wheel was almost immediate, anxiety creeping back and he actually shivered with it, there sitting in the middle of the desert. He could physically feel the concern, pressing on his temple and against the back of his neck, a prickling feeling down the sides of his arms. But he held himself together, as he had powered through these intense emotional responses before, and managed a light chuckle as he once more gathered the things together. "Yeah."
Easing to a standing position again, he turned and gathered everything up before walking around the craft again. He was getting a little better at it, as long as he kept his focus forward. He paused to open the back seat and put the blankets and coats in there before returning to his side door with Jerry's things.
At the surprise expressed at the sight of the eye patch, Lucas blinked down at it too, before peering up at Jerry again. "Uh, yeah. I always have one . . . well, since the last time . . ." He shrugged. After Jerry losing his eye patch a couple of times, it had just been an automatic response for Lucas to start caring back-ups. In his mind it was the least he could do, saving his friend some of the awkwardness that came with having to either try to drape his scarf over half his face or hold his hand over it for who knew how long. Even though Lucas could look at the scar without any disgust, he knew other people might stare, and how self conscious Jerry was about it. Lucas nodded at the thanks, smiling softly and feeling just a bit lighter at seeing the other's smile. He muttered a "You're welcome," while handing over the gear.
About to head back to close the trunk, he paused again as he picked up on another shift in Jerry's posture, the way the others eye moved off him. His thoughts beginning to churn again already before Jerry prompted him to get moving again. With a nod, Lucas carefully leaned back out of the hovercraft and returned to the trunk. Sitting on its edge again, still not completely confident on his feet, he grabbed a couple more blankets and then pushed the luggage around a bit to get the weight evenly distributed again. It was getting these simple tasks done that was keeping him together. If he could focus on one small thing, he could grasp the next, and then the one after, and eventually his mind would be on the right track again . . . hopefully. Everytime the reality of what had just happened came to mind it felt like it hit him from all sides, but he was the last person who needed to break down at the moment. Jerry, Jerry, he . . .
Lucas closed the trunk and made his way back to his seat, relieved when he sat down and pulled his door closed. His return was met with the sight of Jerry fiddling with his eye patch though, and Lucas watched for a moment until it became clear that the other wasn't going to make any headway.
". . . Here," he said quietly, reaching out to take the task from him, waiting for the other to move off it before taking hold of the eye patch and undoing the current knot. Pulling the eye patch over, Lucas took the time to flatten it on his leg and make sure the laces weren't twisted or knotted up before gently leaning over with it again to begin tying it on. He went completely still trying to get it tied without his fingers fumbling it, uncertain if he would be deft enough in his current state, but he had already started. Fortunately muscle memory seemed to be helping, all the other times he had fixed Jerry's eye patch making this attempt relatively smooth.
His gaze drifted over to Jerry's as he worked. On rare occasion it still almost startled him, how close he could be to Jerry without a second thought, when if it was someone else he would probably be fighting the urge to shudder. But there was just tired, gentle concern in his voice rather than any unease as he spoke. "You- you could probably have used a new one, anyway. Jack and Flash put the last one through a lot . . ." He offered a slight smile, before finishing up with the knot, sure to not catch any hair in it. "We can rest here a little longer, if you need to," he said after he was done, leaning back again. He would off to drive himself, but between his current state and not knowing the way, that was probably a horrible idea. "Unless you would rather just get the driving over with. Just . . . whatever you think is best." He nodded a little at this, sure to give the other the most reassuring smile he could, though he knew that would do little to stop Jerry from putting his concern for Lucas far and beyond his concern for himself.
[attr="class","anothernight"]Jeremiah Burton HOVER FOR NOTES
[attr="class","anothertag"]
Feel free to go skip ahead to them reaching the rest stop.
C’mon, you stupid knot… Jerry loosened and tightened, adjusted and twisted the strings, just trying to get the stupid patch to stay put. In hind sight, he probably didn’t really have to wear it quite yet. Lucas had seen the scar enough that it no longer made him cringe, stare or look disgusted, and as far as Jerry hoped, Lucas would be the only one that’d be seeing him for the rest of the night. However, wearing the eye patch had become something of a security blanket for Jerry by now. Covering his damage from the world just made him feel far more comfortable than leaving it out there for anyone to see. Although, you’d think after all these years of wearing this thing, Jerry would be a fair bit better at putting it on. Today though, his fingers simply refused to cooperate and move as fast as he’d like them to in order to avoid catching his hair or anything.
He felt the eyes on him and like a deer in the headlights, he froze briefly before that promising “Here” from Lucas would fill the quiet air. Almost every time, without having to ask, when he struggled with the eye patch, Lucas was content with taking over the task of trying to get the strings to cooperate and properly stay around Jerry’s head. Jerry glanced towards the blond as he started to reach over and the red head relented at that point to pass on eye patch duty to Lucas. He got to work on starting the Hover Craft back up then while Lucas took to flattening back out the patch on his leg. With the craft rising up steadily again, Jerry would tilt his head to look back over at Lucas and watch until the patch was ready to go back on his head. Once Lucas began to pick it back up, the one eyed young man would obediently lean over to make the task a fair bit easier for Lucas. In just a few seconds, the knot was tied back up and Jerry could comfortably settle back in his seat.
“You-you could probably have used a new one, anyway. Jack and Flash put the last one through a lot…”
Talk about an understatement, Jerry shot a glance towards the rearview mirror at the mention of that, Jack being the only one of the troublesome duo visible in said mirror. The spearow just looked back at Jerry in a silent indifference as usual, before Jerry would look back to Lucas who proposed the option of resting just a bit longer here instead. He slowly started to shake his head with a gentle sigh. “Yeah, I just want to get the drive over with… If I sit around too long, I’ll probably just end up falling asleep in this seat” he explained before carefully shifting the gears of the craft.
It began to drift forward slowly as Jerry took a moment to consider their location in his mental map. Once he recalled the direction they should go, the craft would begin to pick up the pace. “You’ll really like it out there, babe… The stars are some of the most beautiful I’ve ever seen out here. No clouds, no city lights, nothing blocks the view, I swear” he chuckled a bit, sparing a glance towards Lucas before looking back forward.
It’d take another half hour of driving to finally have the target of Jerry’s path to come into view, and probably almost an hour to actually arrive next to it. A massive gutted ship that by some magical means managed to find it’s way into the middle of BFE. Jerry carefully brought the hover craft around the barren ship to drift into one of the giant holes in the exterior in order to hide their craft from view of passer-bys. Luckily, years of wear and tear had left the ship at this point pretty much just a hollow skeleton of its former self that the hover craft and far more could fit snuggly inside of it without much issue.
Shutting the craft back down and forcing himself to exit the vehicle, Jerry ducked his head slightly in response to the aches and pains of moving about at the moment. However, disregarding it, he simply turned to open the back door and whistled for both Flash and Jack to finally exit the craft and stretch back out again. Flash loyally hovered near Jerry while Jack took to exploring the higher parts of the ship. With them out of the craft, Jerry rubbed his shoulder with a soft sigh and scanned his hide away for a moment before leaning to the side ot peer over at Lucas.
“You wanna sleep in the craft, or you wanna try and test the elements?” he questioned, tilting his head to see the sun steadily lowering in the sky in the distance. There was a soft rumble from his stomach, but he didn’t bring attention to it, assuming the noise was too quiet for the blond to hear. “We can share a blanket and sleep close together for warmth – y’know body heat – or if you’d prefer, you and Flash can start up a fire or something…” he suggested but was clearly a bit unnerved by the latter which was more evident as he tacked on “I’ll just crash in the car instead if we do that.”
Lucas leaned back in his seat as the craft got moving again, turning his head so his cheek rested against the seat and he could look at Jerry as the other described the desert at night. It brought another soft smile to his face, just as much for Jerry's continued effort to comfort him as it was for the possible view. "It sounds really nice," he said in soft, genuine agreement. While the city had been his home for the majority of his life, he had somehow always been drawn to the wilderness just as much. Especially after stargazing with Jerry as children - it had always afforded him the most wonderful peace. Maybe it would do the same now, for both of them, if only for a little while. Something beautiful and pure after everything they had left behind.
Aware of Jerry's sensitivity to others watching him, Lucas would soon turn his attention to alternating between the view ahead and looking at the readouts of the craft's energy and cooling situation and the view ahead, with still the odd glance over to check on his friend. Fear of the lulling, hypnotizing effect from earlier kept him from taking in the vast desert sands rolling by for too long.
The sight of the ship quickly stole his attention though. At first he thought he wasn't seeing it clearly, that the perspective had him mistaking it for something else. Or that it was a mirage. But as they drew closer it became clear - it was in fact a ship, stranded in the middle of the desert. Lucas blinked as the massive figure loomed up, part of him trying to fathom the why's and how's but quickly giving up on the more critical thoughts for ones of just general awe and curiosity. They were going inside it? He leaned a little against the passenger door, looking up through the window as they passed through the breached walls into the craft's body. Caught up in looking through the window, he barely noticed it when the hovercraft stopped and Jerry and the Pokemon got out, blinking and turning to look over at Jerry when he eventually spoke.
He unlocked his door and began to open it as Jerry presented the options, briefly twisting around to look back at the sun as well. The grumble of Jerry's stomach didn't go unnoticed though - it was so quiet out here, and his alertness went in and out like the tides. When he was paying attention, things sometimes almost seemed too noisy. And already he was trying to remember what kind of food, treats mostly, was still leftover in the luggage.
Lucas looked up sharply at the mention of starting a fire, and shook his head. That wouldn't do at all. He wasn't putting Jerry through that on top of- of everything else. "Sleeping in here is fine," he assured. It wasn't as though they hadn't shared a sleeping space before, and besides . . . he didn't really want to be apart from Jerry now. And he didn't want Jerry to be alone, more than anything. The thought of it bothered him a lot more than it would have under other circumstances, a little spark of panic in the back of his throat forming that he quickly swallowed back. "I mean . . . I don't need a fire. We have plenty of blankets . . . and we can fold the backseat down for more space, I think." He looked back at the luggage in the trunk space. "There should be some food, too, if you're hungry."
He opened the door the rest of the way and climbed out, steadying himself with a hand on the top of the door frame for a moment before heading back toward the trunk. "You should sit down and rest. You've been going nonstop - I can get everything pulled out."
Jerry had gotten them to safety, it just made sense for him to take it from here, for now. His head was definitely clearer than it had been earlier. Some of the edges were still hazy, but he could manage long enough to get them settled and Jerry hopefully as comfortable as possible.
There had to be so much on his mind . . . Lucas fought back that shudder again and popped the trunk open.
[attr="class","anothernight"]Jeremiah Burton HOVER FOR NOTES
It was just the final stretch he had to make before they could both just lay down and rest like they so desperately needed. As Lucas vehemently shook his head at the suggestion of a fire, Jerry seemed to be a bit relieved, but part of him was disappointed in himself at the fact it was his own fears that was making things a bit more difficult here. A fire was so warm, but he almost felt like part of his face was heating up at just the memories of it. Shaking his head to dispel the memories and regain his focus, he looked back to Lucas as he agreed to sharing the blankets. Sleeping in the back of the car was far better than just being exposed to the elements, so Jerry was already making his way over to help clean out the back when Lucas would speak up regarding food and resting.
“I’m fine, Lucas” he assured, though Jerry was still far from fine… He was at least alright enough to function properly, but if push came to shove again, he’d have one hell of a fight to just not crumble. “We can pull it out together, it’ll go faster and then we can both rest sooner” he informed, already moving to Lucas’s side to start grabbing some of the luggage. “Let’s stack it up in the vacant space there, the ship’ll protect it from any sand that gets blown around and we got plenty of blankets to spare to cover the stuff up if needed” he explained, glancing over at Lucas with a pause to see if he’d object again. He glanced back inside of the hover craft, before looking up and giving a slight tired smile. “Hey… I think I parked it just right there if we put our heads there, we’ll be able to see the stars through the sun roof” he proudly stated to try and keep focus from harboring over the subject they weren’t entirely agreeing on.
He knew Lucas wanted to take over, to let him rest, but he couldn’t handle just sitting around too long without something to focus on now. Every time he looked at Lucas without a goal of his own in mind, his mind trailed back to the house – to what was at the base of the stairs. The cringe worthy feeling of pinching at the base of his skull, that shutter that had ripped through him back then, just thinking about it almost brought a sour look to his face, but he refused to dwell on it. He was already grabbing suitcases and moving to carefully stack them up beside the car in a way any pro jenga player would be proud of. Just the final stretch, he assured himself with every burning tug and strain on his muscles. Just the final stretch, he repeated in his mind as he nearly stumbled out of a brief kneel. At that point, he backed off slightly, he was reaching the point of being unable to hide his aches and Lucas would only panic further if he saw that.
Either way, as predicted, with Lucas and him working together, it certainly went by far faster than he’d anticipated and he turned to see the sun was finally setting. The desert sand seemed to practically glow as the sun seemingly came closer to the ground. The sky was painted with oranges, reds and yellows, an endless canvas of magnificent color going on forever outside of the hole in the ship. Without turning to look at Lucas, Jerry just reached behind him to lightly pull on his arm in a call for his attention. Once feeling those precious baby blue’s on him, Jerry would simply point towards the sunset and slowly turn to glance back at Lucas with a tired but warm smile.
“If you think that’s beautiful, just wait until the stars are really visible… They’re so bright, even without the moon, it almost feels like the desert never gets too dark” he explained softly with a small chuckle. He looked back to the sun setting, the coming of night promising peace, quiet and rest, washing over him with a warm wave of comfort as the closest star in the sky would slowly sink down in the horizon.
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Post by Lucas Courtwater on Dec 7, 2014 18:14:15 GMT -5
I DON'T QUITE KNOW HOW TO SAY HOW I FEEL
[attr="class","springscrl"]But you're not fine, he protested silently. Neither of them were, but Jerry . . . there were the needles again, the pressure on his head and neck. The internal struggle between trying to get through this night in peace or trying to ask Jerry about what exactly had occurred back at the house. Looking at Jerry now, no matter how much the other tried to play it off, Lucas knew he was already a mess. Lucas wished he could give him a break. The safest, longest break.
After a pause, Lucas just nodded at the Jerry's reasoning for them to do the work together, watching Jerry as he went about grabbing the first couple of bags. Then he moved to pick up some as well, singling out the bag with some of the food for later. "Alright," he said quietly, not daring to argue, looking over at the space Jerry indicated and starting toward it with the bags. As Jerry spoke up again he slowed though, turning to look back at him and his smile, and then upwards, biting his tongue. Words just didn't want to come out right just then. These last few months with Jerry, he had forgotten how wrong the world could be. And even though he had seen it, felt it before, everything hitting him again tore straight into him, and knowing how bad it must have been for Jerry only amplified it. "It's perfect Jerry," he said finally, looking back down and returning his smile briefly before heading over to put the bags in their place.
He could feel himself getting bad again. He tried to focus on the work, but it did go by quicker with the two of them working, letting his mind go back to Jerry and what he was sure had happened. The unease came then, and when he got anxious like this the edges started to go hazy again. He stayed on his feet though, one foot ahead of the other in methodical fashion, only really looking up from the task to check on Jerry. He didn't notice the sun beginning to sink behind the horizon, or pay any mind to the slight shiver that went through him as the temperature in the ship began to drop. He walked back over to the hovercraft to pick up the next bag only to find none, the blankets already stacked in the back, and he just stared down at them trying to think of what to do next when Jerry tugged on his arm.
Lucas turned slowly, looking to Jerry first, gaze then traveling to where the other pointed. He sucked in a breath at the sight, because it was truly beautiful. For a moment his mind cleared, Jerry's hand on his arm in comfortable warmth, and he could almost feel his eyes watering but he blinked it back if for nothing else than to keep his vision from blurring. He hung on Jerry's words, not just for their content but for what sounded like genuine sense of peace in them, however temporary. Every part of Lucas just prayed for Jerry to be OK, to be really OK, and with a slight shiver he very slowly moved to touch it shoulder to Jerry's - not even a nudge, just a light touch before swaying back again.
"This is the kind of place we always talked about finding," he said softly. He looked up toward the darkening part of the sky. "I can't wait to see . . ." Even if the circumstances were horrible, he began to hope as he had before that this place, this view, would give them both a little comfort. ". . . Do you- do you want to eat something now?" The package with the food had been left by their coats and blankets in the trunk. Horrible occasion aside it would almost be like a belated Christmas camp-out.
Glancing back to see Lucas actually have to catch his breath at the sight of the setting sun, he felt a brief moment of relaxation at the fact it seemed Lucas was focused finally. However short the time was, having Lucas being able to focus clearly was relieving. He didn’t move his hand from Lucas’s arm, and gave a slight smile when he spotted the tears being blinked away in his eyes. When Lucas’s hand moved to his shoulder, Jerry’s gaze finally drifted back to the falling sun, listening keenly to Lucas’s words. The kind of place that they’d always talked about finding, yeah, this was definitely it, he was sure. He bowed his head slightly as Lucas looked up and suddenly part of him just wanted to turn and hold onto Lucas. He almost got flustered at the desire, but he wouldn’t act on it right now. Lucas began to move along, asking about something to eat and Jerry brought his head back up with a slow deep breath.
“Yeah… We probably got like some of those Christmas cookies left?” he lightly joked, turning his tired smile to Lucas. The other would probably give a light eye roll before the both of them retreated to the car to dig into their food supplies and settle down in the back of the hovercraft for the night.
Dinner was for the most part uneventful. There wasn’t much talking, just simply eating for now. Both of them were exhausted and Jerry almost fell asleep, honestly, but a bite of his tongue on accident jerked him back awake. This carried on until Jerry would look up to see the stars in the sky. Dragging Lucas to sit side-by-side with him, he’d start to point out some of the constellations and point out which of the stars he’d followed in order to find the city Lucas was staying at. Dinner and the stars helped to lighten the mood, but no matter how many stars he could name and point out, it didn’t ease the weight of their situation on his mind. Eventually, he stopped pointing out the stars and just simply sat there and stared at the endless glowing dots in the sky.
They were so small, weren’t they? Jerry slowly turned his head to glance at Lucas beside him, studying more clearly the bags under his eyes, his pale complexion in the darkness – illuminated by just a little lamp they had with them – and his frail appearance. Despite being there to force him to eat, to keep him from getting lost for hours in his own mind, to brighten his day and make him smile, looking at him now, it didn’t feel like he had done enough. Jerry’s gaze fell to their laps, studying the meals they’d gradually been eating, though it was hard to maintain an appetite right now with how exhausted they both were.
At that moment, he wanted it all back to the way it used to be. Like when they were kids, maybe, or just before this whole Campaign Investigation Gang really took off and everything went crazy. He wanted to go back and talk Dorothy out of this madness, to go back and force Lucas to focus on just school and not start this crazy investigation, to go back and maybe just vanish from everyone’s lives altogether, maybe that’d fix it. He’d done so many things wrong, maybe something he’d done had caused this whole spiral downhill. Maybe if he hadn’t been such a wild child, things wouldn’t have come to this. Maybe if he hadn’t been born…
He froze when he felt the tears building up in his eyes, suddenly pulling himself from his thoughts and he reached up to rub his eye and hopefully rid himself of the tears before they’d fall. Shove it down, bottle it up, throw it aside, he didn’t have the right to be the one crying and breaking down. Not after the things he’d done, especially today being the day he crossed a fragile line. There was no time for him to bow his head and cry, to hide away with all of his regrets, or beg for forgiveness he surely didn’t deserve. He was the knight to his prince and it was his duty to stay strong and keep it together in case the other fell apart. The rock in which Lucas could lean on should he not have the strength to stand… A shaky deep breath, he had to bring his head back up and slowly Jerry did. His head rose from its bow to look to the sky with an aching and exhausted gaze. Swallowing back the urges to cry, he avoided looking at Lucas for a moment. Rattling his mind for a moment, Jerry pushed aside everything to try and focus on something that might cheer them both up.
Looking over to Lucas, finally managing a small smile after he’d processed his thoughts he lightly nudged him to get his attention. “Y’know, a night out camping needs a song of some kind” he lightly joked and looked up in thought with a soft hum. “You got any requests, babe?”
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Post by Lucas Courtwater on Jan 2, 2015 14:13:32 GMT -5
WOULD YOU LIE WITH ME AND JUST FORGET THE WORLD
[attr="class","springscrl"]The food didn't taste like much. More like remnants of a Christmas years ago rather than just the other week. Stale cookies and holiday cheese and sausage that he could hardly stomach more than a few bites of. There was nothing truly wrong with the food. Just with everything else. It felt like too much of what it was. Yes, for the sake of their health they should probably get something in their stomachs - but there was no mistaking that this meal right here was not much more than a distraction.
It was sort of like hope was this kite or strange new Pokemon flying far ahead of them. Every time Lucas managed to get a glimpse of it through the trees, it darted off on some sudden wind and he lost it again. The wisp of hope that had come with the sunset had mostly fizzled out. He didn't feel quite like crying anymore, but at the moment things weren't getting better either. It could have been called a numbness if not for what he was feeling for Jerry.
Lucas didn't possess any psychic inclination for empathy, but he didn't need it when it came to his best friend. When you have a connection like that - when the spark is so fierce and perfect and real - you just know. As though the other person is an extension of yourself, you feel every shift in the atmosphere. He had had years to become familiar with them. He didn't even need to look at Jerry to pick up on the heavy tiredness to all Jerry's movements, the preoccupation, the dullness. He nearly jumped a little himself when the other jerked awake after nearly dozing off.
It was times like this he really wished he knew how to speak, or at the very least had over the years been able to adopt Jerry's ability to seemingly effortlessly brighten the mood. Just trying to imagine what could be going on in Jerry's head . . . he always liked to say he was fine as long as Lucas was there, but was he really?
He was relieved when Jerry pulled him over to look at the stars. Being close to him at least felt like something. Just as he always had, he listened carefully, practically hanging on every word, but not just to learn about the stars like usual. He was just listening to Jerry's voice, the nuances, trying to gauge further how he was, trying to think of some way to say something that might help. But when Jerry eventually trailed off, he still wasn't sure, and just stayed close there, shoulders touching for a long moment.
It was when he caught the movement of Jerry reaching up to rub his eye that he began to open his mouth to maybe ask, tell Jerry if he wanted he could tell him anything, but Jerry nudged him and looked over then.
Lucas looked up at Jerry, smile reassuring as he leaned a little against his shoulder in another gentle nudge. He knew most of this was just trying to make Lucas feel better, but he prayed it helped Jerry too. Jerry didn't give himself enough credit for how selfless he really was.
Someday I'm going to do more for you.
". . . Surprise me," he said softly, leaning to rest his forehead against Jerry's shoulder before tilting his head up to look at the sky again. "Anything you'd sing will sound great to me."
If only he did have empathy. Maybe then he could just send Jerry everything he felt, so his mind wouldn't get all wrapped up in trying to vocalize it. Jerry could know first hand the depth he loved him, accepted him, wanted to support him. He never felt like he was on his own with Jerry; the thought that Jerry might possibly feel that way now put a knot in his chest.
Tired baby blues turned to him and if there was ever a sight that helped keep him going, it was that smile turned his way. As Lucas nudged against him in return, Jerry chuckled softly and brought his arm up to loosely wrap it around Lucas’s shoulders. Dragging the Courtwater closer to him as he remembered the night would bring with it an awful chill, Jerry did a brief once over of his friend to ensure he was warm and set for the night ahead, before looking up in silent thought. What song would brighten their spirits? Assure Lucas they’d be okay and help calm down their nerves? He hummed softly, going through some of the notes of a song, before shaking his head a little and softly humming another few notes. No, that wouldn’t work either. Jerry pouted slightly, humming another tune slowly as he looked out the back window of the hover craft, into the vast never ending desert sands stretching out for miles and miles. Another light hum and he paused as an idea clicked. Glancing to Lucas, he studied the blond for a moment, before looking back up to the sky.
Humming softly once more, he built the tune up now for him to start singing. “I can't believe it's over, I watched the whole thing fall” he softly began “And I never saw the writing that was on the wall… If I only knew the days were slipping past that the good things never last… That you were crying.” It wasn’t the typical Jerry performance, where he was getting up and dancing around the place, live and energetic. He was too tired for such a thing right now. However, that didn’t stop his voice from carrying the same practiced and beautiful sound it carried as always. Now, that tune just sounded a bit sad, in contrast to his usual merry. Another gentle hum and he began again. “Summer turned to winter, and the snow, it turned to rain. Then the rain turned into tears upon your face. I hardly recognize the guy you are today.” He slowly brought his head down to look back over at Lucas with a sad smile.
“And God I hope it's not too late… No, it's not too late” he began to drag this sad song back up. “Cause you are not alone, I'm always there with you. And we'll get lost together-” he leaned forward to pick up the lamp lighting up the back of the hover craft and tossed it up slightly in his hands “-Till the light comes pouring through” he chimed with a little playful smile at Lucas, “'Cause when you feel like you're done” Jerry gently set the lamp back down. “And the darkness has won…” he trailed off for a moment, before looking back to Lucas - “Babe, you’re not lost” - and leaning over to lightly press his head into the blonde’s hair with an affectionate nuzzle. “When your world's crashing down, and you can’t bear the thought… I said, babe, you're not lost” he softly assured with a gentle smile, kissing his head.
Bringing his head back up a bit, Jerry’s gaze turned back out the window to the desert. “Life can show no mercy, it can tear your soul apart.” Reaching up to lightly slide his fingers over the black cloth of his eye patch, Jerry took a deep breath before continuing. “It can make you feel like you've gone crazy, but you're not” the words trailed off for a moment, hitting a little close to home for him personally, before he managed to continue on que. “Though things have seemed to change…” His eye turned back to Lucas. “There's one thing that's still the same.” The smile grew a bit on Jerry’s face as he reached up to lightly pat himself on the chest. “In my heart you have remained, and we can fly,” he got a little mischievous look and “fly,” reached over to pretty much pull Lucas up and over his leg “fly away” so the Courtwater prince sat between Jerry’s legs. His arms looped around Lucas from behind, and he seemed a bit amused by the change of position. It wasn’t that much different from the times Jerry would curl up around Lucas when they’d have their sleep overs,
“'Cause you are not alone” he chimed out matter-of-factly and pressed his forehead to the back of Lucas’s head. “And I am there with you, and we'll get lost together til the light comes pouring through.” Head moving to rest on Lucas’s shoulder and nuzzling into him, Jerry had closed his eye to imagine them back in front of the piano. Lucas’s fingers gently dancing across the keys as Jerry would sing a tune or two. “'Cause when you feel like you're done and the darkness has won” he tightened his grip gently. “Babe, you're not lost…” he gently pulled Lucas back with him as he leaned back again so they slumped back to stare up at the star covered sky. “When the world's crashing down… And you cannot bear to crawl…” he softly trailed off and cracked a little grin. “I said, baby, you're not lost…”
Repeating the final line softly a few more times, he wasn’t sure if that song was enough. It wasn’t as upbeat as his usual tune, leaving him for a moment unsure. His mind went back in time, thinking to the day he and Lucas had finally reunited after his prince was sent out here to the middle of nowhere. Refusing to just leave the air empty with the end of that song, he’d go back to something a bit more familiar this time with a call back to another song he’d sung for Lucas before.
“Y’know, we’re gonna be just fine, babe. As long as we stick together because…” he softly spoke, as if he was going to just talk for now to continue filling the silence. “You're a falling star, I’m the getaway car.” However, Jerry’s words could easily be recalled to another certain song he sang months ago. “You're the line in the sand when I go too far, the swimming pool, on an August day” he continued talking, not singing quite yet, but just speaking the words with a subtle rhythm. “And you're the perfect thing to say.” He chuckled lightly and grinned to himself so proudly.
“And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.” His voice began to drift closer to actually singing once more as Jerry worked to cheer up the mood. While the song called for him to go back to his energetic performances, Jerry was content to sit there and simply hold onto Lucas instead. “Ah, when you smile at me you know exactly what you do” he tacked on with a small laugh, though his laugh was almost silent. Lucas would probably feel it make his chest and shoulders shake a bit. His voice remained soft as he teased “Oh babe, don't pretend that you don't know it's true, 'cause you can see it when I look at you” he brought his head back down to look at Lucas and once more rested his head against Lucas’s head. “And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times” he sang quieter now, as if to only let Lucas hear him. “It's you, it's you, you make me sing…” Smiling warmly and pressing his head once more down into Lucas’s shoulder – “You're every line, you're every word, you're everything” – he relished in the warmth of Lucas just simply being there.
If Jerry were more energized, if maybe it was a bit earlier in the day, he would’ve sung that whole song as well. However, the day was catching up to him something hard. So rather than going into the whole song, he’d simply stop there for now and trail off into the song’s “So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la…” Even rocking Lucas a little as he sang this part, before slowly stopping the action and simply humming out the rest of the la’s. Jerry began falling silent and closing his eye. At that moment, he almost immediately started to doze off, comfortable and exhausted, but he made the minimal amount of effort required to stay awake for a bit longer. Gradually bringing his head up as his tune came to an end, he leaned over to kiss Lucas’s cheek as he had the last time he sang that song. Then his head would immediately fall to rest on the blonde’s shoulder, again. This time, he had his head turned to be able to peek up at his friend to study his reaction to the music.
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Post by Lucas Courtwater on Jan 8, 2015 14:08:20 GMT -5
AND I WILL PICK YOU UP WHEN YOUR WHOLE WORLD SHATTERS
[attr="class","springscrl"]Lucas nestled in comfortably beside Jerry as the other pulled him over closer, listening to the other quietly hum to himself and think. He already felt better from just the normalcy of this moment, the temporary calm easing his nerves and Jerry beside him settling his mind. Whatever was wrong with his head, he was sure it hadn't been as bad once Jerry had come for him.
Jerry started to sing. Lucas swore his breath nearly caught every time just that first word rang out. Jerry's voice really encompassed much of what Lucas loved about him - the warmth, the practiced and gentle care, the fullness and charisma, even as softly as it began. He closed his eyes for a moment, head resting against Jerry as he took in the words and the melancholy turn to them. ". . . That you were crying." Lucas tilted his head to look up at Jerry, one hand moving to hold a handful of Jerry's shirt. He turned to look out the back window of the craft and the other continued. He would look back at Jerry though, as he turned to him with that sad smile, and Lucas returned it, his own almost apologetic. If he could just get better somehow, it would be one less thing for Jerry to have to worry about . . .
The song began to lift, though, and he followed Jerry's movements as the redhead illustrated the song with the use of the lantern. His smiled warmed with just the thought that Jerry was singing this for him; he had chosen it specifically to give him comfort. It had kind of always been like that, hadn't it? When they could find the words, they ended up telling each other in music. And Jerry added on in the affectionate nuzzling, the kiss to his head that he returned with a smile and a gentle nudge.
But the next set of lyrics seemed a little more difficult for him to get through, at least at first. This close, he could feel it when Jerry's other arm shifted or when he took a breath, and Lucas held very still for those moments, paying attention, his grip unconsciously tightening on Jerry's shirt as the lyrics about feeling crazy came and it seemed to take him a moment. Jerry's smile returned though, and Lucas only ha d a second to catch that mischievous look before he found himself being pulled up. His hand let go of Jerry's shirt and he found himself resettled, not uncomfortably, with Jerry's arms around him. He turned back, about to shoot Jerry the slightest of done looks all the same, but he couldn't when he glimpsed the real amusement on his friend's face. He chuckled softly instead, shaking his head slightly and turning to face forward once more, resting back.
With the words to the song, Jerry's arms around him and the other nuzzling into his shoulder, it was hard not to think back to the song he had written Jerry, to all those times in front of the piano at home. Jerry didn't know lyrics existed to that, and really they weren't lyrics particularly, but a meaning Lucas' mind had assigned to the notes. But he wished he did have a piano here with them now, so he could play that song back to him.
Lucas may have been a little taller, but Jerry was easily the broader of the pair, and it was a secure feeling, sitting here like this. He wasn't anxious about the people after them anymore for the time being, but his thoughts were still focused on Jerry's well-being, still happy to hear that smile in his voice as they rested back facing the stars.
As the first song ended, Lucas reached up and gently squeezed on of Jerry's wrists in silent gratitude, not expecting another song. He guessed they would try to sleep now, if Jerry wasn't half-way there already, and he would have started to shift up slightly to pull a blanket over had Jerry' not spoke up once more.
He felt himself fluster slightly as he realized quickly Jerry was speaking that song - the one from that perfect evening when they had been reunited again. And Lucas could feel the smile in his voice, the quiet laughter that shook him. The loving way the song was so completely for him still made it impossible to contain a warm grin. This, this is what he wanted so badly to do for Jerry. Just give him that feeling of being so wholly and unconditionally loved, of being protected. To let him know that Lucas had his back as much as Jerry had his. As Jerry again pressed his head into his shoulder, Lucas nudged his cheek gently against his hair, smiling.
As the song grew quiet and the words trailed off into humming, with Jerry rocking him slightly he even began to feel a bit genuinely sleepy, though he stayed awake, listening. With another silent chuckle as Jerry kissed his cheek, he looked over as the other's head fell to rest once more on his shoulder. Lucas' smile was tired, but was sure to glow still with a warmth and gratitude that reserved only for Jerry.
"Thank you . . ." He touched his head briefly to Jerry's again, and said softly, "I love you, Jerry." It barely sounded like enough, after all that Jerry had done. Seeing how close to falling asleep Jerry was, Lucas glanced back and reached over to pull one of the blankets up around them. He thought for a moment,eyes traveling over the stars above them for a moment. And then tentatively, so quietly that only Jerry could have heard him, he spoke. ". . . Your song . . . the one I wrote for you, that Christmas . . . There were words. Lyrics, I guess, I didn't know how to say at the time. But I'd try to sort of think them to you, whenever I played it. J-just a chorus, mostly . . ." The rest was there but not set in stone. He ducked his head, face hot. He hadn't really meant to start talking, but now . . . Lucas felt like Jerry just needed to hear it, he had to answer the comfort Jerry had given him. He couldn't sleep without trying to give Jerry just this one thing. So, he shifted slowly, giving Jerry time to lift his head before Lucas would turn to face him a little, eyes still shyly cast downward toward Jerry's shoulder. "I am with you," he began, speaking as Jerry had, with just a hint of the rhythm. ". . . I will carry you through it all. I won't leave you . . ." His voice fell to a whisper for a moment as he just struggled to get the words out without stuttering or being overcome. "I will catch you, when you feel like letting go." He paused, closing his eyes a moment before finally lifting his head up to smile at Jerry. "Because you're not- you're not alone."
Flustered and tired, he ducked his head again then, just resting on Jerry's shoulder this time as he muttered one last line that had come to him, "And I-I will be your hope when you feel like it's over . . ."
As he sang to his friend, Jerry could feel mountains of weight gradually ease off his shoulders with every smile and chuckle he managed to get out of his friend. For a moment, he had worried that moving Lucas in front of him so he could more properly hold him may bother his friend. However as Lucas turned to him, instead of his typical done expression, the amused look Jerry offered had managed to ignite a chuckle from the blonde. Smiles, affectionate nudges and laughs, it all warmed Jerry’s heart and he could almost feel the tears returning to his eyes as he bare witnessed to some spark returning to his tired friend, again. After the long day they had had, he wouldn’t dare just allow his friend to fall asleep with just the thoughts of disaster and danger waiting for them over the endless horizons around them. If there was one thing he wanted to get right today, it was just to bring some peace and joy to Lucas before they fell asleep tonight so maybe, just maybe, Lucas could rest.
Which was a goal he had managed to achieve if the beautiful smile Lucas turned his way meant anything. Even with Lucas being quiet and reclusive, even with the fact Jerry was not an empath, Jerry could read his friend like an open book with general ease. The warmth, the gratitude, it was all there even if Lucas was tired and it helped soothe a lot of Jerry’s concerns for the night. As long as Lucas didn’t know what Jerry had done, as long as this whole mess was wrapped up soon, this moment made it feel like there was a chance to just slowly go back to the simpler days for them. With Lucas’s head pressing to his with words of gratefulness, Jerry smiled warmly in return and brought up his head slightly to just gently nuzzle him, again. However as Lucas whispered that he loved him, Jerry almost paused, but he simply shut his eye and let his head rest back down on Lucas’s shoulder to hide his face.
He didn’t deserve that love. He never did.
“I love you, too, Lucas” he softly responded as Lucas took to wrapping them up in a blanket. He sniffled a bit, shifting his weight a little as the blanket was pulled around them before settling back in place. If they fell asleep with Lucas resting on him like this, he wouldn’t mind at all. In fact, almost every single time the two ended up sharing a bed, they’d wake up with Jerry somehow koala hugging Lucas or tangled up with him one way or another. Falling asleep with Lucas using him as a pillow would be perfectly fine and he almost preferred the idea. It just meant that if anyone managed to sneak up on them in the middle of the night, they’d definitely have to go through him to get to Lucas.
That thought suddenly unsettled him. His eye slid back open and he brought his groggy gaze back up to study the windows of the craft while Lucas’s gaze had turned back to the stunning stars. While he’d brought peace to his friend, it only in turn resulted in Jerry becoming aware that they were still being hunted down out here. He looked for headlights and just any sign of danger, but all seemed quiet and peaceful as far as he could tell. They had both fallen silent for a period of time before, surprisingly, it would be Lucas to break it with a rather unanticipated mention of Jerry’s song… Well, the song Lucas wrote for Jerry. Pulling his head from Lucas’s shoulder to look back towards him, Jerry would find that Lucas was still staring at the sky but steadily becoming flustered as he spoke. His words revealed that the precious song Jerry cherished so much actually had lyrics and that made Jerry’s heart skip a beat. He actually got a little flustered from just the idea of such a thing. Immediately, he wanted to ask what the lyrics were, what else had Lucas wrote for something he already found so beautiful? The original melody blew his mind with just the piano music alone, so well done and carefully crafted, that the very idea of lyrics had Jerry even more bewildered.
Before he could muster up the courage to ask what Lucas had wrote, the blonde began to move in his arms. Reluctantly keeping his head from falling back onto Lucas’s shoulder, Jerry sat up a bit straighter and offered his full attention as always. In the back of his mind, he knew that Lucas was definitely not a singer. Not because of a lack of talent mind you, as the few times Jerry had managed to get Lucas to sing were quite delightful, but it was simply the fact it wasn’t something Lucas was comfortable doing. Stick him in front of the piano, though, and Lucas seemed to just bloom with every musical piece he performed. With that in mind, the fact Lucas had come up with words for the music had him at a loss for words. That song was probably forever the most grand gift Jerry had ever received and it only grew more magnificent each time he heard it.
“I am with you…” The first words from Lucas just made Jerry’s iron walls begin to crumble. Lucas’s soft voice carefully waded through the debris and easily managed to make their mark on Jerry’s heart. Part of him wondered if maybe Lucas was seeing through him like the way Jerry almost always saw through him. It was easy to tell that right now Jerry wasn’t exactly alright, despite how much he tried to insist otherwise. Like his singing cheered Lucas up, Lucas must have caught onto the fact that playing the piano and this song always brought up Jerry’s mood. This moment was really meant to be for him, for his sake, and that realization left him in a brief moment of awe. He could hear the slightest bit of the rhythm of the song in Lucas’s voice.
“I will carry you through it all. I won’t leave you…” A small smile began to cross the exhausted Jerry’s face, even if Lucas wasn’t able to look at him quite yet. Despite demonstrating all the confidence in the world, it was moments alone in which Jerry’s insecurities leaked and Lucas managed to tackle one already. The fear that one day Lucas would leave him behind, yet Lucas had chosen lyrics that specifically stated otherwise. To dismiss them as just Lucas’s kindness speaking felt wrong because this was genuine, these words weren’t just run of the mill assurances, but things Lucas had thought explicitly up for him. Thinking back to those times now, and what had been going through his mind before Lucas had found him…
“I will catch you, when you feel like letting go.” Even though the words had not been uttered back then, just hearing them now spoke just as strongly as the piano music had back then. Despite the talk of being the stone here, Lucas was the only thing that kept Jerry anchored around here. If Lucas had let him go five years back, if they had gone their separate ways, Jerry wouldn’t be here anymore, that was fact. The red head slowly brought a hand up to press it to the side of his head, almost covering his eye. His face steadily grew notably flustered and tears were building up in his eye once more. The words of the song that Lucas had chosen were words of comfort, assurance and a reminder of the fact that Lucas cherished him far more than Jerry could ever understand. While the street rat liked to think of himself as a strong person, someone that didn’t need to really rely on others to keep him going, he always said that as long as he had Lucas, he’d always be fine, and in this moment…
“Because you’re not-you’re not alone.”
Jerry steadily remembered just why he always said that. Despite the tears and the day’s obvious toll on him, the sight of Lucas’s brilliant smile and the words that came from his heart like this, they brought a very much needed feeling of ease with them. Jerry couldn’t help but give a warm smile back to the blond when he saw that he was happy in this moment. His prince suddenly ducked his head to hide his flustered face again, pressing into Jerry’s shoulder, and Jerry could only admire him with a silent loving gaze. “And I-I will be your hope when you feel like it’s over…”
Lucas always was and always would be his hope, Jerry could never deny that. To hear the words come from his mouth, especially in these grim times, it sunk in deeply. The tears began overflowing at that point and Jerry just slowly nuzzled his head against Lucas’s once again. He wrapped up around him a little more, his grip tightening – though remaining gentle and comfortable. He smiled softly, despite his fears clawing at his mind, and just took solace in the ability to be right there with Lucas once again. After a pause and replaying the words in his mind, he paid attention to the rhythm this time before slowly he’d start to softly hum from where Lucas had left off. Wiping off his face and reaching to the side to shut off the lamp, Jerry continued to hum as he adjusted the blanket and settled in for the night. With a firm kiss to Lucas’s head, Jerry nuzzled his head into place against Lucas’s again, with no intention of pulling away. He was silent minus his gentle hums before they’d trail off into silence. There was nothing for a moment, before finally Jerry spoke in a soft whisper.
“You’re incredible, you know that? I didn’t know how that song could have gotten any more amazing, but those words… They’re perfect, Lucas… They’re absolutely perfect.” He paused briefly before tacking on “Thank you.”
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Post by Lucas Courtwater on Jan 13, 2015 18:45:17 GMT -5
AND I WILL PICK YOU UP WHEN YOUR WHOLE WORLD SHATTERS
[attr="class","springscrl"]His heart was pounding, his eyes squeezed shut against Jerry's shoulder, completely flustered from actually being able to get those words out without practicing a thousand times over in his head. And even more than that was the desperation, in that moment, for Jerry to just understand how much he meant it all. It was something he had always worried about, just doing his utmost to make sure that Jerry always felt loved, always knew that he would be there. Making that he knew that even the basic necessities would all be covered - he would always have food and new clothes, he would always have somewhere to live as long as it was in Lucas' power. The concerns pulsed through him for a long moment before he began to settle down again, cherishing the warm smile Jerry had given him, feeling Jerry's head nuzzle against his and picking up on the the other's tears.
Jerry had heard. He'd managed to get through, at least a little bit.
Relief flooding him, he nuzzled a little into Jerry's shoulder as Jerry's grip tightened warmly around him. completely tired out now but silently wishing for Jerry to feel better. Jerry was the physically affectionate one of the pair, and Lucas struggled with returning it a lot of the time, but he hoped just being here close in this moment was enough. He couldn't help smiling a little wider as Jerry started to hum, tilting his head to peer up at Jerry for a moment before closing his eyes again as the light was shut off. He settled in, one hand absently gripping Jerry's shirt again as Jerry's head pressed back beside his.
Everything would be alright. It would be difficult in the days to come, and things would be scary - but they were still together, and nothing could get in the way of that. Jerry would open up when he was ready, and Lucas would stand by him, and they would deal with everything as they always had - together.
Listening to Jerry's humming, more stray lyrics he had pondered would come to mind, but he was too sleepy to pin them down. But someday he was going to write all of it. He was going to make Jerry another set of sheet music, like he had that first Christmas, only this one would have the lyrics all clearly written out, and it would be Lucas' promise to him. When they were home, and this was all over, that's what he would do.
The humming tapered off with the song, and Lucas wondered vaguely if Jerry had fallen asleep for a moment before he started to speak. Lucas flustered a little again, just smiling half-way into his shoulder and giving a little headshake-nudge. "It's just the truth," he mumbled. "Just . . . Anything . . . anything for you, Jerry." It was usually Jerry's line, but he couldn't think of a better way to put it at the moment. And he would write music for Jerry for as long as it kept making him happy. "You should get some sleep now," he continued, still at a sleepy, mumbled volume, just content to lay where he was, even though sleep might not come quickly. It was warm and Jerry was there, and that was about all he needed to be comfortable for the however long the night lasted.
There had been something else he was going to add, maybe some extra reassurance, but it was lost now, the blond's mind just drifting over thoughts for Jerry, what needed to be done in the morning - There was still food for breakfast, wasn't there? Christmas jam or preserves maybe . . . - and keeping focus on anything Jerry might say before he went to sleep.
The truth? At the mumbling, Jerry almost shook his head, but stayed still as Lucas spoke. His friend had no hesitance to promise him anything, and it wasn’t hard to imagine Lucas would give him anything. After all, Lucas done so many times in the past; giving Jerry a home, food, family, friends… A reason to live. The thought slowly sank in and Jerry tilted his head to look over at Lucas as he uttered his final words before inevitably starting to fall asleep. What thoughts were going through his friend’s mind as he dozed off with such a calm expression? It had to be something silly like breakfast. Falling asleep to the thought of mundane things like that, Jerry didn’t care if the situation called for them to be more on edge, the fact Lucas was able to fall asleep so calm and at ease was enough to almost bring tears to his eye, again. It was a silent blessing in what was suddenly a beautifully peaceful moment to Jerry on a day that had been nothing but nightmares until then.
He wouldn’t fall asleep for a while, no matter how exhausted he felt from the long day. His mind was suddenly far too restless now without Lucas’s voice to softly calm the storm that stirred inside. Although, it seemed that with Lucas just resting there in his arms, his presence alone was still a source of strength to fight his bubbling emotions. It was progressively easier to do when his focus rested on Lucas, as always. Doing so once more brought up the thought about the fact the blond was able to fall asleep after the previous months of struggling to do just that, and the fact he fell asleep looking so seemingly carefree… Even if he was able to calm himself down and relax, the only thing Jerry couldn’t stop were his tears that finally broke through to start running down his cheek. He rose his head from Lucas’s shoulder to tilt his head back and look up towards the beautiful night sky above them. The tears flowed freely for the first time in a while, but Jerry didn’t cry out or make a sound. The calm just settled over him as he studied the stars and searched for a constellations.
The look in his eye dulled considerably as he tried to focus on the stars to help him be more at ease in this moment. His mind wandered away into the stars… The memories that came with them both pleasant and frightening, he allowed all of these thoughts to sweep over him in a fruitless attempt to escape today. The weight of the day still lingered tough, even before Jerry began realizing a hour or so must have passed with him just staring at the sky. So lost in his thoughts, time had slipped through his fingers and glancing outside of the car, he’d spot the sight of Flash and Jack nestled together by the luggage. It brought a small smile to Jerry’s tired expression before slowly bowing his head and gently nuzzling his way back into Lucas. His arms tightened around him and his hands grasped the blanket coiled around the precious prince in his arms almost desperately. With a slow deep breath and exhale, he just melted into Lucas and allowed every ounce of him to just focus on him, again.
Was Lucas cold? Still asleep hopefully? Come morning, Lucas would probably still want to try and do a million things for him and Jerry would try to bring that number down to one or two things to keep this dork of his focused, but not exhaust himself in the process. The thought of how much Lucas fussed over him made his face show an amused expression. The night may be long, but here with Lucas in his arms, he’d eventually find enough of a sense of peace in his troubled mind to fall asleep just as calm and content as the beautiful man in his arms.
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